Saturday, September 24, 2011

Crushed in between all kinds of aunties,fat men,thin men,women clad in burkhas, girls swaying to music on their headphones,boys flashing their blackberries (EVEN in that unbelievably jammed train), I gasped for breath.
"Oh shit! If Dad finds that inspite of all the warnings I've booked tickets for a second class and this is where I've landed up,I'm so dead!" .

Tap Tap. I felt someone tapping on my shoulder. I turned to see a hideous man asking me to move my bag away from him.
"Madam, lagta hai aapka bag. Udhar upar rakho"
I felt like punching him with my other hand and throwing him on the upper slot instead. Here I was fighting a battle of wits and weights to move even an inch and this scrawny fellow wanted me to move my bag it seems.
Thankfully the guy flashing his blackberry came to my rescue, " Give me your bag and check your seat number."
Thanks blackberry boy! The hideous man meanwhile kept complaining, "
Kya Madam. Udhar jagah hai na.Rakhtey kyun nahi"
"Chai Chai, side side side, chai chai" .
Side? Kidhar side? This is no different from a local train. Chai Waalas don't ever step into a local train. I thought they understand that!! (huh! Blah! Angry! Flustered)
Okay! Enough!I mustered all the energy within, pushed,shoved,nudged,punched and bravely fought my way towards my seat which was "three compartments" away.
Level 1 crossed: Whew! Relief!
This level looks easier, less crowded. I crossed a huge man and his tiny girl-friend/wife with her head on his chest murmuring something.
Romancing in the train!!!! In a normal day,I would have swooned at the sight(thanks to my love for cheesy romance).But today! The frustration in me was at an all time high and noone romances when I'm flustered! Ooops!My bag
"accidentally" hit them spoiling the moment.Even before I could bask in sadistic pleasure god gave it back to me as a rugged bunch of paan-chewers jeered,"Madam, yahaan jagah hai. Baith jao!" (Laughter)
Sadistic pleasure replaced by indignant anger.I told myself to ignore and move on.
Level 2 crossed
The final level looks clear. There's hardly anyone here. I guess people had settled in by the time I reached the next compartment and was more than relieved to find a bunch of girls around. Whew! No more hideous men tapping at my shoulder or Paan chewers leching.

As I settled into my seat and felt the wind blowing on my face, the chronicles of the previous compartments turned into stories I couldn't help laughing at.

No wonder India and its jam packed trains are a writers delight!


Sridhar Ramachandran said...

i bet you purposely banged the bag on that couple.. you sadist!!

PJ said...

Your anecdotes are fun! Keep 'em coming!

Anonymous said...

NICEEE... but agreed.. u did ditch the bag on them on purpose didnt ya!!!!

RJ said...

"chai chai...side side side... chai..." superbly written... tooooo good! ;)

Rahul said...

hmmmm..ahh well......seems like surviving a train ride is no easier than crossing the levels of an unbeatable video game.....:-(

magiceye said...

that was a wonderful read!

Madhusha said...

@rahul :u got it right but its fun nevertheless.
@Magic eye : Thanks! :)

Madhuresh said...

Traveling in a second class compartment in Indian railway is indeed worth an experience! 'tis like traveling with the real India and real stories...and the open windows... standing at the gate of the boggie...seeing India passing by and coming on... :)

Madhusha said...

So true :)

And thank you so much for reading all the posts and commenting.