Saturday, September 24, 2011

Dear Mr.Right.....

Dear Mr.Right,

First of all, you're obnoxiously late in finding me. So that makes you quite a bit of a wrong.
Thanks to your being busy with something, which CANNOT be more important than me, I'm doubted of having a secret affair (What am I starring in? A romantic suspense?)/waiting for someone who'll in the end drop me like a hot potato/ thinking a bit too high of myself/ being insensitive/ being completely unrealistic etc etc.

I don't blame anyone for accusing/ doubting/ being exasperated by me. But YOU! I'm angry with you for taking so much time to find me. And Yes! This dramatic hate letter intends to scare you and prepare you for some serious trouble in the coming months. I'm quite tired in my search and have decided to be a bully when I find you.So here's how you'll make up for being late and making me go through this ordeal of family,uncles-aunty's and random people raising eyebrows at my "status quo",

1) You'll read ALL of my blogs, right from the first day that I started writing here and post a comment on EACH one of it. Just in case you think you can get away by glancing through them, not happening ( Talk to the hand)

2)You will either have to buy me gifts worth four months of your salary or give me a cheque equivalent to that. Yes! Money matters. (Straight face, I'm not kidding)
Vini said she wants a gift too because she had to bear with my search and endless stories about a "you" who's imaginary even now. Get real! Cant sustain this saga too long. There's a family drama full throttle happening in the background, that's a tough one to avoid too long.

3) Once you find me, please arrange for an extra cheesy "Be mine" moment. I like all elements of a Yashraj movie and am not apologetic about it. You'll kind of have to live with it.

4) I will be extremely moody,mean,sarcastic and rude to you for sometime. You're at fault for not being able to trace me in this small world and because of that I've had to look like a fool/snob/bad daughter/wierdo more than once in front of more than one person. So I have already earned the ticket to being a brat with you and you've lost the right to stop me from being one.

5) I'm noting this date because the drama in my life is at its peak right now. If I trace your history into having fun (god save you if there was a chick around) in this phase, I'll make your life pretty miserable. I hope you're whining,sulking,weeping and depressed in some corner of the world. Why should I go through the drama alone?

So, Mr.Right, please get real now.I cant explain a non-existent creature (you just earned that crass title) to people without sounding supremely lame. And ya! Read the list again, I wont compromise, either on you or on the list.

Love,
Esha !

20 comments:

Sridhar Ramachandran said...

LOL...
All the best.. Pt. 2
really tough!but u know they say 'no kami for fools in this world'

Savvy said...

Mr. Right you better find Eisha and spare us ....even we are facing the music daily and we would want you to please make your special appearance asap :)

~Sree~ said...

Aayega aayega. wait for it.

munirgupta said...

so i think this is how long the relp with him would work.. from blog number one to this blog..

dhriti said...

this is the best 1...and yes pleaseee Mr. Right find her,(though we love pulling her leg abt YOU)...Also she has been mean and hasn't introduced us to u yet, i guess she doesn't want to scare you away already, but u shud knw, we i.e. inder, vermaji and myself 'DEE kapur' r a major part of her life....so to keep her happy, u first gtta make us happy....GOT IT MISTER....good, welcome to the 'world of no return'.....hehahaha (evil laughter)....

Anonymous said...

wow.. quite interesting.. like the way u express urself

Yogesh O Pareek said...

these things remind me some grt old days when i acted as a MI6 agent oo7
remember sister ..

RJ said...

tooooo good... my best wishes are with u n ur Mr.Right... classy writing yaar... luved it! :)

AnuPriya said...

Hey, Did u get it out right or what,I do imagine everyone who goes through this feels and expects all u've written down to the T and believe me life centers around this one mythical Mr.Right and he ends up being LATE.
Well for the one obscure being called Mr.right u better make an appeareance before i end up becoming Mrs. Someone else.............

Madhusha said...

@sridhar : fools??? Is it :p
@savi and sree :bechaara cartoon character ban gaya hai ...mr.right :D hehehhehe
@Munir: Talk about well wishers...sigh
@dhriti: I've scared him enough, thanks for adding cherry to the cake :D :P
@anonymous: thanks ....
@yogesh: Lol.
@RJ: Thanks ;-)
@ANupriya:Mrs. someone else?? lol. i doubt you'll have to go through that. :)

Rahul said...

ahhh..finally....something to build up the female protagonist of my next fiction piece on....:-D good..goood.....looks like the heroine in my story is gonna give my hero some serious butt-kicking...:-D

Madhusha said...

@rahul: hahahah...i'd love to read that...send me the link once ure done with the story. :D

rahul said...

:-)

Madhuresh said...

Ah! I'm having almost similar feelings for my Ms. Right. :)

Bahut achha laga aapke blog par ana.. shubhkamnayen aapko!!

phatichar said...

I liked the sign-off - 'love, esha'..hehehe

Roshan R said...

Just saw this post now and had to share the male version of this blogpost with you :)
http://www.godyears.net/2007/06/to-stranger-i-love.html

Informationjinxed said...

This is the most interesting OPEN proposal that I've read.
Clarity of expression and vision is amazing!! I really liked the four months salary requirement.
All the best with your Mr Right.

parv tamrakar said...

Tempting :P

Ronak Jain said...

Probably you shoud check out the "Mr. Right Now!!" :P
Gud post though!

Madhusha said...

haahahahahaah funny :D :D